People are too stupid or stubborn for me to have it be worth it to explain any problems.  I wonder what they'll do to me for saying this on my blog.  😅

Also, there are too many.

I'm not here to negotiate with these animals all the time!

People are beating me because of that girl that comes here.

The people monitoring me in private claim to follow Ellen DeGeneres supposedly trying to make me feel duped and flattened out to be calm like I'm in trouble, just because I was upset about her putting hurtful, illegal noises in my room, it seems.

There's this lady who comes to watch over at the group home that keeps bothering me because once I might have felt upset with her being mean like I'm being a bad person.

The people monitoring me in private think they have to make problems to make a statement and if I get over it chase after me so it really was for nothing at all.

So, to state a fact, the people monitoring me in private are sometimes or too often making up things just to take time and have nothing to say.  I don't want it to get worse just because I said that "didn't work."

Why are the people monitoring me in private lingering on stupid things that I reject?  It's like an animal attacking me.

I don't really matter, according to what they do.  They aren't fixing it, neither, probably making it worse and disturbing me, "for now."

The people monitoring me in private keep acting like I did something wrong and like I'm close to them etc.

They think we're close and I'm shit as a person, but normal people don't think that of me.  They hurt me for my private thoughts.  They might do something stupid like hurt the lady for it now "because I said this."  Some people don't know where they aren't wanted.

The people monitoring me in private are a problem as people.  I can't think what I want.  They say they are a fat Italian.  They want to think simply and hurt me.  I'll find I am more retarded.

Sometimes, the people monitoring me in private have something going because they said I suggested it and then just keep doing it.

It wasn't even a big deal in that way.

I'm being hurt for it, too, and damaged.

I think they're upset for no reason in a way that's obvious, and I don't know who made it this way and maybe they don't, neither.

I didn't do anything wrong, and the whole world is selfishly fresh with me, except for "the upper echelon."

Are my present problems all the antics and "stubbornness" of the guise of the people monitoring me in private?

Did you know the people monitoring me in private made up / pretended that I had an issue saying things and then saying I don't mean them, so if I think that they get really mad?

This maybe English-Australian lady thinks I shouldn't have a "relationship" I'm supposedly supposed to have with a a Late Baby Boomer European lady.  English people can do trash, it seems.

I wonder really why when I don't want to do the things they don't want me to I feel tackily manipulated.  I have been recalling I am upset my dad ordered this when I got upset on my blog about my life being ruined..

It seems Cleveland is considered special and I'm under the mercy of superficial rules of my personal thoughts.  I wouldn't want to hurt anyone.  I do feel vulnerable, though, so I will feel "down" and frustrated.  It seems I need to move around if I'm alone, and I need to get away and rest if I'm with people, if I want to stop getting in trouble with the people monitoring me in private for my private thoughts.  I honestly think it's unfortunately involved in something, possibly, with either something alien or something "divine."   (I'm posting that last sentence on my blog.)

So, I think I'm still pretty mad at the sharp turn that must have been taken at some point saying to myself I won't do something bad to someone, a certain word, when I get mad, so I don't think that I will because the people monitoring me in private think it will help not to say it.  I saw a vision of someone like rewiring my brain to think it when mad and I have maybe every day since, in the form I mentioned at least moreso of later times or more lately.  So, I'm upset probably it was okay at first and then it wasn't, to think I won't do it, too.  It doesn't really matter.  I think it's criminal and a sin to act like I can't even think of a curse word and to torment me and ruin my life for it.  So, I usually process ... "the truth."

I feel I was told a talk show host feels a desire to kill people if they are too nice to me if they keep doing it, after the people monitoring me in private got mad I hated their possibly worthless picking on me, often envisioning what the talk show host would desire me to suffer.

Supposedly, this maybe English-Australian lady who conducts a choir at an ally boys school by Sydney is said to be dangerous and just say I need a worse fate when they pick on me like they have a reason to like this and still in ways.

So, like, I noticed...

...they "had" to get to me without me being prepared to be nice and understand and feel hurt and thinking some bad words by accident, and it happened throughout the day.  Now, I'm in big trouble with them.

The people monitoring me in private think I meant something bad and hurtful and mean against a Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to have a "relationship" with.  I didn't.  People have been acting like everything is her fault, so it just finally became a critical problem.

They made it so I couldn't check myself and hurt me and of course the blame was going to her.  I caught something when I still lived in Orlando where it seems like I thought it was her but didn't mean it.  It doesn't "go away..."

Now, the people monitoring me in private think they're all drama like they're everything and all that and I deal with their "trash."

I also see that these things are said not to matter but later are said to be true and not just wandering thoughts.

I seem to be avalanching from some people, too.

They keep acting like my old choir director / organ teacher is saying my dad's youngest sister's daughter's oldest son is being rubbed into me in a bad way and saying I'm nothing.  Perverted, too, huh?  They ruined my body, in ways, doing this.  I was attacked with people using her, too, and she knows I was thinking something jokingly, though I didn't tell her.  She did things, too, eventually.  I honestly don't remember the order.

Other things are also going on...  Like, I showed physical signs of anger in some proximity to the Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to have a "relationship" with, and supposedly it's over, for me, sometimes like she didn't want me, anyway, but because of this.  It's like I'm no longer permitted to have the "relationship."  I was made fun of like "a hoot and a holler" that my age is not in sync in "sex" with her because it's only for Late Baby Boomers, and the younger people are all either too old to be their kids or too young to be their kids.

Who knows what else has gone on?

This boy in the group home is bothering me too much watching me and reacting to my every move.  He's Black, has an accent.  He's heavyset and has a hard time talking.

The people monitoring me in private have problems, like I'm right there and they attest I'm just another person and freak out about Late Baby Boomers.

They also seem to threaten they will ruin a Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to have a "relationship" with if I say something is hurting me, like to say they need to just test her and ruin her in the process.

The people monitoring me in private are supposedly the ones making a big deal about any little inkling or a characteristic "attitude."  I think they are merely copying my parents's shortcomings, but I am fine,

So, they are monitoring me in private and being mean.

It is easier for anyone to get their thoughts out in writing or typing etc.

I don't even care if it were true, those people are *beep* to tell me the lady has a problem with me.

They don't care I hear them insulting me maybe how the page on the internet loads.  They start off when I stop paying attention and can't get it out of my head.

This seems dangerous, like the lady was ruined for me.

They sometimes ruin how I feel in physical parts etc.

Why am I wasting my time?

Why do I keep hearing them inappropriately stimulating the lady?

This shit of Cleveland is world interest. I guess it wasn't just Orlando.

I meet cool people and they won't accept I'm a good person.

I don't need the *beep* of East Cleveland pretending to have a brain and dictate my life and lie to me about the lady.

They just come here to pick at stupid things like at least they didn't kill me.

They have nothing to offer as a person, just saying I need to be monitored like something is wrong with me when I got good grades and behavior.  Really!  They think all these good things I hoped for I don't deserve.  They ruined my life.  They hate I exist.

This is going too far, I can't ever post it all, at least not all the details.

They think I did something and said they  ruined the lady, now.  People just can't stop picking at her, and it's over for me for a pathetic reason.  It's like I'm selfish, but I'm accomplished.  I'm a nice, good person.  People make up shit to ruin my day, every day..

People can't find a solution for my life, like I'm punished, when I also haven't done anything wrong.  I'm stuck in a group home without enough food or money..  I can't eat what I like.  I've been trying to go for a job, but some say to do it and some get angry and say not to, like relatives.

The people monitoring me in private don't care about the circumstance, just blame me for not always being in 1 mood.

The landlady thinks it's okay she didn't tell me someone would move in.  I'm not like forgiving and tolerating, cowering down.

People go stupid if I talk of how mean they are to me and if in any "power" make it worse.

They are inconvenient saying I'm bad and think I succumbed.

They just take what the lady does and pick at it to give her more "sex" and ruin it for me, in such a way.

It's like they turned her into a "sex" object and like she's nothing to anyone.  They are just mad they aren't still kids.

They think I should forgive them like it's my fault and they're mad I said it.  Nothing wrong with talking..

People keep acting like, "Hey, this doesn't matter. I don't get it."

So, it's like it's over for me and they are ruining it for me.

I can't do anything I want with people following me around saying the lady is over and doesn't care.  It's like one answer could be it was never for me because I was bad..

They're just sitting there like maybe it's true, and the lady says she has to "go along with the crowd."

They keep saying more mean things.

Well

People outside are acting like the lady is getting inappropriately stimulated and she's lost from me.  It's as though it's the first time and they're losing it.  They are still making fun of me like I want it.  They think that the only accomplishment is to say nothing and accept things.

...

People keep wasting my life joking, and now it could be over in many ways..

A new roommate is moving in with me, and everyone is acting like a Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to have a "relationship" with did it, and I heard she really had nothing to offer yet took over my underground fame but also got all this "sex" from the world all the time.  I even caught wind of an outbreak that she doesn't care about me and the journey I was put on led to nothing but so for others but also that it's like I'm bad and didn't deserve it.  Oh, before, I though I would still have my own room, in the group home, and I didn't even want to sleep in the same bed as if I had a husband or share a room.

So, I wasn't warned of things that supposedly got in the way, with this supposed "relationship."

So, I'm fed up, I am not 100% sure of why but know there is potential, and people keep hating on me, like I don't matter.

They keep focusing on her and I suffer, like she is always about to die.

...

I'm always faced with adversity.  My dad supposedly started it.  The people monitoring me in private don't care/anymore.  They think they are owed everything, when they had ruined my life and blamed me, when clearly it was not me.

A boy in the group home acts like he's out to get me.  I live with Black people.

He just follows my every move and tries to affect me.

I'm done with group homes.  This was shit.  I won't take those boys bossing me around.

I found the people involved monitoring me in private are throwing me more problems for no reason just to make me dysfunctional and live a life in general of shit.

The people outside keep saying this lady ruined my life.  Well, they're going crazy, and they caused the problem, this is not about them.  They just want me to feel uneasy about the lady so she can torture me, more than I am.

I keep getting in trouble for posting here.

I'll really be in a situation, and people will take the time to rub it in each time as a topic in general and act like I'm shit like they're badass from the 80s and early 90s.

I know, I get caught up in details until they get mad I think of a bad word by accident.

Anyone can spout anything at me and me be affected and held accountable.

Whatever makes the people monitoring me in private uneasy turns into a war.

They want me to have inappropriate feelings with others.

They are getting personal punishing me for no reason.

Every time I hear something, the people monitoring me in private punish me.

At the time, it comes to that I "don't need it," people inflict.

I end up on the bad side for off topic reasons.

The cars outside say stuff I wouldn't know otherwise.

I am not that mad at people like that lady.

People like to act like the lady did it.  It always leads there with their jagged-y eb and flow.

People outside are freaking out like they have a problem when they cause it.

It's wrong to do this to anyone, and they seem to be goofing off bothering me while others are elevated over me by them or others.

I feel in trouble more for posting here and it seems worthless to think I can do anything.

They don't know what I should do if so upset and bothered.  My therapist said to get up and leave the room.. but they're still there, even with earplugs/earphones.

They're throwing my life away, like this is it.

They keep attacking me, and the police must know.

I mean just think they actually did it, whatever the reason.

They actually said they hurt the lady too for something they didn't like I did, that showing some physical anger when in private.

People think they will be okay if they are bad but act like I am.

They keep acting awkward about me in private.

I don't have money nor much space for a punching bag, so how can I healthily release anger physically, either in private when I'm not mad, when I'm mad in private, and what to do in public?  No one just has no.

I don't have enough money for food, so I may not get as much violin practicing done, napped today, wakes up people at night, so I'm upset.

I wonder if I need to call churches for free food, I get a list but not always there and food not so great.  I've not wanted to be out so much lately.  I may have to only walk to churches to get it, too, since bus passes are expensive and I didn't get my government money appealed for more back yet.

I figured I was naturally not feeling well for awhile, and they wanted to do it on purpose.

I can't believe no one has helped me out and my government money reduced for no reason without the appeal process first to prevent it.

"I think they're 'ghey.'"

They're being especially mean to me.

I've had some physical effect.  I don't feel much.  😔

Follow the Leader

Since they're not doing anything apparent, maybe we should sometimes just sit with this and talk how stupid it is so they can't alter our thinking in bad ways and be affected.  So far, I've been able to turn it off and ignore other people for the most part, but I'm just sitting in my room hearing what's outside, with my earphones on with classical piano music.

In bad ways that she might not like, people are just focusing on somehow ruining it for me with a Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to have a relationship with and inappropriately and incessantly trying to get at her and inappropriately stimulate her.

I think they are hell bent to ruin my life, if I think I can ever feel okay, when I'm not upset or after.

I already know I don't want to leave my room and go downstairs and run into the boys in the group home.  The nicest one is leaving November 1st, and I wanted to, too.  I think the stress has gotten to me.  I was upset and may have skipped my morning meds.

People are being suggestive to me because I nicely used information to make a point.

The side of the maybe English-Australian lady is getting more intelligent saying if I just ignore people being mean to me she's going along with me like I'm shit..

They would be waiting for me to solve a problem when none exists, like the fear of getting upset and possibly leading to some physical reaction, however small and even if in private or because in private.

I've also strongly established that people are doing this innocently trying to get me to react physically or think of a bad word so they can punish me every day.

When I am proud I'm good with no physical anger in private, they get hysterical and obnoxious and seem "brainless" and think what shit are we here for?  Well, it might have been a valid point.

I can't stand when they give me punishment for feeling upset at what others did simply for an extended period of focus and reason.

Also, sometimes I forget it's okay when I'm listening to them and when I think for people to stop they don't.

I guess this is important, after all, though it is really bad to do to anyone.  That really gets in my way, should I report this?  It's like when I went to the mental hospital, the police already damn know and don't care.  My old violin teacher from Poland talked to friends/family on the phone, and they said it is so dangerous in the middle of German and run by Muslims that it's so dangerous the police won't come to help you.

I don't feel like doing anything.  I have to take a shower, practice, study sometime, I was napping today and wanted to go back.

Is it worth worrying over the problems they have with me?  I don't like how they say it, what to do, when they should know they are wrong.  Only me.

So, I was picked on a lot after agreeing to something mature and hard to accept.

I think it is their own ruin and lies that it's okay.

I don't know if I know of anyone who prides themselves in never having any physical reaction when mad ever.  So, what can I do?  I can't call it off and I don't really want to... you know, with people like that lady.  So, what?  Also, I don't want it to get worse for me.

They keep getting mad if I post here or not.

They just keep making fun of me.  They are being "stupid" all the time.  They are out of control.  They have no point.  They are being so "stupid."  I say something, and they crush me like they are big and "stupid."

I said it!  They just act big and "stupid" if I post my problems online and I get much more sometimes, in the end, as a trick to be on bad behavior sometimes but not all, to build suspense.

They might do something really bad because I reacted physically in private in anger.

I'm sorry, but I've been typing this shit all day and the cars outside keep having something fresh to say.  They are out of control.

They keep getting mad if I show any physical anger in private, like my aunt said, whose off.

They have it on I was upset physically a bit that it's forever shit mathematically and for the lady somehow.

So, just because I nicely said how they said she might have said/done something mean to me.

They keep making fun of me and trashing what I say.

My dad ruined my life.

The people monitoring me in private just threw out my whole life.  I feel too damaged for an afterlife.

They made it so there is no hope.

They won't stop telling me what to do or else, like I got in some agreement when I didn't.

It's over!

People are saying she is finally getting new ways of being inappropriately stimulated.

They won't stop just because I said how they said the lady hurt me and like I'm her mother when she's older.

So, just because I thought it'd be nice maybe not to say what the lady does in this people being mean to me, they made it a real rule and now this is happening.  What lies.

So, I figured I was fine with what the Late Baby Boomer European lady is doing.

However, people kept saying more things.

I was told I wasn't perfect because I included something she may have said in a point, according to others, whatever happened this one day.  So, her "relationship" with me seems to be so it partly stops or lessens and she gets inappropriately stimulated like forever.

They said someone how I don't wanna is gonna restrain me sexually on Friday/s! while she does get stimulated yet maybe inappropriately.

It's like no one else can be stimulated, and everyone is special, but look what happens to me.

Not directing this at the lady, but how stupid really and the mother in me is beat if I post an insecurity having to do with the people monitoring me in private and ruined my life?

Anyway, I just wanted to report the antics of the people monitoring me in private and noticing people going 2 ways about if it's the people monitoring me in private or in the confusing situation really from them..  It was so obnoxious and out there so much etc., the way the people monitoring me in private act, like my dad said to set a disgusting example for me as their excuse for using me to "shit" at.

So, they are just mad I said what the lady was said to probably have done, and I said it nicely.

The cars keep spouting shit for her.

I was even treated like shit to not get upset about something mean that didn't matter.

They said because of this I'm feeling upset the lady goes cross-eyed feeling good.  I thought they wanted me to stop posting about these problems now.

I heard a car say I was bad, like the lady is just mad I ended up posting this here nicely.

They won't stop, trying to get under my skin to believe something I don't want in my convictions of reality.  They will probably do other things.

They just told me I was stupid and like as usual to go fuck myself, thinking I can get away with the world reacting to what I said they did this morning when I felt fine, just to make trouble in a weird way that causes me to say something they say they don't want.

Because I lived in stupid Orlando and I had a thought, the people monitoring me in private said that means I'm guilty.  I was upset they were acting like someone had to say something and I was stupid not to believe it and it seemed like the person would just copy and say the same thing.  They acted quite obnoxious like a Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to have a "relationship" with was really mean and so I posted it but maybe not, it was off the limb.  I didn't say it, but I'm saying now it looks like they needed it.

The cars said she already forgot about me and went on to someone else, like I did something.  This is very traumatic to me, to find it's true.  I think it will be denied in how things go, but it may be true.  She supposedly was set with me.  Whatever it was didn't bother me, but it was a laugh she was so promising and it was over, along with taking things socially in return for ever talking and "tempting" me.

That annoying noise in my house they may have made like maybe an English-Australian lady seem like she's saying something to me all day and for a long timespan kept saying I couldn't meet that lady, probably a message from that lady.

It seems like the lady had to do this, but I am not sure.

These people monitoring my life are really bad, too bad if you can't believe it, joking about not having the "relationship" with the Late Baby Boomer European lady now like I did something and it's "inconvenient."

It seems like they're fine now they made me mad and give me something else to worry about and when they get too old and die they actually forget about me, when their older parental generation doesn't leave them hanging and everyone venerates them and many work in private with their feelings to develop for the world, unless they're socially naked and getting "sex" but in a convenient way etc.

Well, apparently, they want to distract you from what I just said and are trying to test me to say I'm something stupid and annoying etc. like shit in a way.  That's also what the lady supposedly said after I was upset about the other older person. ..

...and that older person kinda acted out of control like she couldn't contain herself.  They're still asking me if it was really her.

They believe they are on top of this like they "know" why they say this lady has problems.  She's a good and normal person.

The people monitoring me in private said they were the hero and subdued her sexually.

They won't stop;

They acted like she meant I had a sex problem and was left hanging and really tacky and shit.

They are getting off as okay.

The people monitoring me in private are lying that it's not their fault.

It was in a traumatic way like I was so tacky, shit, and lost.  They just get worse and worse.  It's not "okay."  It was really bad.

Now, they swear and are excited that the lady just says shit to me to say I'm shit because someone else also used a term like "animal" to label her when she's a good person and I did to how someone else who knew her treated me.

They keep shocking and bugging me with the timing of how the page loads on the internet.  If I try to not think about it, they do it more.  They leave me hanging, after.  They just sit there and act "stupid" like they don't care or even know what's going on, like it's all okay.

I caught this other person in real shit, that the lady has to die.  I know she is just in it for herself, if this is true.

They keep fussing making a big deal of some things like I have to try hard to think around things for them.

Ew, it seems like I have to get someone older than the lady to have the "relationship" I'm supposed supposed to have with her, as though the lady herself has to let all out at her, so there was never really anything in it.  From what I gather from this, they would just think they're always right and I'm always wrong and therefore have to fight it.

They're acting like I'm "left to" a maybe English-Australian lady to get me to adapt to being treated by shit to be tested again, like I just did something wrong with what I posted.  I heard her acting like, "Oh, I have to do it."

 They won't stop adding really bad things.

 People keep blaming the lady.

They won't quit it.  They're just super excited, like they're high on coffee and taking it out on me.

So I was feeling better, and something was wrong.  I just posted it here, and now they went crazy attacking me for falling for it, acting like it's true, though.

They don't want me to think about her? or else I never meet. I am not to communicate they said.

That's not a nice thing to play around with so immaturely.  They didn't explain or suggest, they threw thoughts at me!  I don't think some people have my best interests at heart and act like everything's gonna be okay, in fact..

They kept doing it and are upset I just pressed a button and it seemed I thought something I didn't even mean to go into.

They act like they're so cool, calm, in control, and cute, while I'm some thing on display making a fool of myself!

Apparently, the Black people of East Cleveland, Ohio went crazy, and supposedly a Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to have a "relationship" with is often having trouble, since becoming underground famous over me, holding in thoughts from inappropriately stimulating her, like it was done on purpose ... but anyway, the people monitoring me in private joined in.

The were really nasty, saying I should be killed in inhuman ways and reiterating she was the one who said I made her want to commit suicide.

Supposedly, someone who knows her was super angry and acted like I would hate to have to have a kid attached to me, which is also a low and dirty thing to tamper with like that and say and act like an animal testing me about.  They slammed right at me.  It probably is what she said or, like everyone, had to chose from something like a multiple choice, provided by people involved manipulating my life.

They might have gotten overexcited and started talking to me in new known ways.

I think it's people getting overly involved in my life, made boring and uneventful by them in crucial ways, that made them want to dish this out, like, as things settle, it's time to stir something up.

They think they are messing with me because I am really bad, when it was supposedly just on them.  It's annoying to deal with getting by.

The people monitoring me in private keep acting condescendingly, like I have to fear their every move, like when I load the page on my computer.

I notice someone "took it upon themselves" to act like there's something especially wrong with me, who hasn't communicated with me much.

So many people are digging deep into sensitive topics like someone bad will break the ice, anyway, but a lot of good people don't have that problem.

They keep trying to ruin my life.

I see people are eagerly overly involved.

I keep getting "bad news."

The people monitoring me in private keep swearing they're hypnotized to ruin my life.

With such people, my life has lost having hope.

For some reason, they're creating more problems concerning a Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to have a "relationship" with, interfering and altering me ability to have a successful "relationship" with her.

I wonder if they're helping keep me up.

Some people are just a problem who they are.  It is not to be tampered with unsuccessfully.

They spend a lot of time on me in bad ways for no resaon.

Apparently, the people monitoring me in private are having too many problems to do this.  Someone must be blamed.  I know people aren't perfect, but I'd wonder about their all exclusive access.  Like, why do I end up in trouble for thinking of a curse word and by accident or any small physical reaction when upset and even when in private?  I said no one gives a fuck about how they are to me.  They think these things mean big punishments.  I am right, but, if anything changed from me saying something, it will probably be worse.

They did something to make the Late Baby Boomer European lady ruined forever...

They are making fun of me for it.

The Blacks here are abusive because they hate my mixed race.  They also hate Jews.

According to my world outside, the promise was broken that I be treated with dignity and respect as a human being.  Instead, it's about the Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to have a "relationship" with being separated and treated special til death and about her and I got told I'm a negative out there like I did something and it's like people don't really pay attention to me sometimes and the lady not really being as accessible as they claimed.

They're immature about my private life and prevent it's functioning properly and to its fullest.

They've helped waste my day goofing around.

They just keep beating their insecurities at me about what they've done to me.

They get frantic when I quote that they bother me, and it's like a distraction, some things.  I have to wait to recover.

They make my insecurities the final answer.

They keep trying to mellow me because I have a range of emotions like a healthy, normal person in different situations.

They keep acting like nothing just happened and end my "relationship" I'm supposedly supposed to have with a Late Baby Boomer European lady.

They are acting like I'm the one who's out of control and I have to just forget about her so she can live her life before she dies.

Then, they acted like I was stuck with them being shit and maybe that frantic maybe English-Australian lady who keeps trying to take place of that lady.

You know, the people monitoring me in private haven't commented on why the squeaks coming from the fire alarm in the living area of the group home, from running out of batteries, almost always sounds like a maybe English-Australian lady trying to displace my "relationship" I'm supposedly supposed to have with a Late Baby Boomer European lady.  Isn't that a little corny?  I mean, I know they seem to speak with how the page loads on the internet and with other noises and they set me off if I try to avert it.  It's like England dumped their "trash" on me.  They think I'm in a subdued stupor over them like this, but they "need to think again."  They keep thinking all Irish are bad except that they're close to them and not Germany.  What "idiots."

They keep bothering me and I can't post everything here.

They're making trouble out of unlikely things but horribly and like it's nothing.

They're all over the place and fail to look into the details and take things in abstractly bad ways.

I heard cars outside saying Ellen DeGeneres was ruining a Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to have "relationship" with.

I feel annoyed, like they are monitoring my behavior but already decided.

They keep acting disgusting, like my dad wants it.

They said because they thought I wasn't ever much.

What a cheap ploy, to try to make me feel seductively quelled like I was shit to feel upset.

They seem not to be competent/nice for this job.  They can't "give a fuck" and get it together, and I suffer as the solution.  They are superstitious about if I post here etc.

It seems suggestive the lady is made to be mean now, but I can do whatever I want and not listen to those people or anyone.

They keep making more threats.

They are made another vital threat.

They might be threatening me, like hypnotizing me to think something or else the lady says she dies to me.

They are following me more closely and snap at anything as if to show off.

I wonder if they'll stop acting suggestively slow, drawn out, and seductive.  They don't believe in me having a variety of moods and don't care if they hurt me.  So, the lady they make out like she's being that way, too, and also incapable.

 People just can't stop, they keep doing more and more and are delusional.  "Expect the unexpected."

Well, as the people monitoring me in private might know, I've been doing better alone taking bad messages but release my thoughts when I'm around others.

It takes a lot of work to deal with the people monitoring me in private, all excited coordinating all involved in this trash that resulted from them to blame.

Do you believe that these messages from these cars that are full of negativity might be the cause of significant inciter problems?  Things are fine, but a button was clicked and comes trouble, from somewhere out in the abyss.

They tire me out.

They keep messing with feelings to do with me and a Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to have a "relationship" with.

They're messing with me "sexually."

I'm sick of getting up to go to the bathroom.

This is partly about what ails the people monitoring me in private like I wanna be close to them like this.

I noticed something to be concerned about but realized it might be okay but we'll see and they hurt me in some way because there might be no hope for me, like they believe that.

They keep trying to be there for me making me "sexually" "sleepy."  They are messing with my real feelings, offended I felt upset at them for bothering me.

I'm upset because I can't change what a Late Baby Boomer European lady decides if she feels pressured, but also if I talk about problems with those concerning her maybe I'll lose even more contact and others will gain more later.

It seems important because I may have felt so upset it hurt someone monitoring me in private or just executing messages.  I know today I was upset I had nothing to return to when those around me thought it was their job to rub in things that hurt me and annoy me as people.  If I'm for no reason in trouble with the lady, I tend to feel less happy and less prone to tolerating people bothering me even more and about it, also then if I do start to feel upset about the situation with the lady that the people monitoring me in private will always hold it against me, with no consideration for that I was just trying to dodge and defend myself from other people who know.

I don't want to hurt anyone, but it feels like I have to be ready for lots of people bothering me.

What I can't stand is special rules that I can't feel upset or else, things happen, including physical signs of anger even in private.  I get mad that it will never get better.  I also lost both my parents within a few years.  Then, they say, like my dad said his mom thought once, that if it happens around something "why then!" it must be related.  His sister might have thought with the mom that I need to be stroked into submission if I feel at all aggressive or assertive-  So, now it could open a new can of worms, like the lady evolved and grew immune to something and has to be involved in this trick/game.  Moving to Ohio, it's like everything leads to the end, even things that aren't real big problems, in general.  No one said why, it just happened.  I was bamboozled.  They're just upset I was defensive when secretly abused...  I don't usually do that on purpose.

They keep inflicting others on me, like I take a joke but that maybe it's not a joke.

It's like I lost everything, like I did something.

They exploded again like this man would be the goal at the end to do with the lady.

It keeps seeming like they're leaving it to the lady, like she has a dark side and continuously warbles on if she needs to do these mean things to me.

They also say things happen to inconvenience me, saying they are punishing me for the past or "minor setbacks.  I am a good person, I only defend myself and get unavoidably provoked on purpose.

Yesterday, because I posted those problems here, they said it would be about this man with a Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to have a "relationship" with not just every Saturday forever but also every day.

They think I have to do whatever they say.

Think how worthless they are being.  They're common, superficial psychologists or amateurs.

No one gives a fuck.  I don't intend to be disagreeable like others, seriously.

It seems it's not a dead topic, this man uniting with the lady in supposedly said uncomfortable ways every Saturday, "stirring up 'trouble.'"

They keep being stupid and freaking out like it's hopeless.

I keep feeling the people monitoring me in private keep creeping around me and use material of what I thought to form their own original nuisances after me.  Now, with their access to me, they have the privilege of learning and applying and misusing my thoughts against me.  Sometimes, some people do bad things.

They think they're all that like I'm some shit on a program.

I'm not here to believe the lady did it and is tricking me.

They won't stop saying/doing mean things just because I posted about this critically traumatic experience.

So many good and intellectual people are so nice to me.  Why this?  What's the excuse?  This is so nasty.  I didn't do anything.  Nothing matters when it's about me.  They think I've lived my life.  No, I've been trapped by their nonchalant, apathetic, lackadaisical, and indirect nature of getting things done and being honest, lying like I was to go on with my life without them messing it up.

They think they have a VIP to do whatever they want if they're pissed off and say it's more or calculated punishment from something else they didn't like I did a long time ago.

Other people's lives are supposed to get better, but my efforts are pushed aside, like nothing's wrong, according to some people.  Well, I don't have to work this out, as it's a problem.  Still, I am faced with adversity.  My relationship with this lady gets worse, and this really freaks me out, disgusts me, and grosses me out, you know whoever all contributed or their claim it doesn't matter, from the bad people.  How can one be cool with this?  Is this what I get attention for?  To let bad people enter and influence my life?

I shouldn't have to live under their blase scrutiny.  Other people don't.

How is this going to be faced?  I didn't do anything to deserve this inconvenience.

I wonder if the lady is upset in general because I don't acknowledge and I turn away things people say to and do to me.  I don't think most normal people, including her, would be.  Supposedly, she doesn't do "that part."  So, let's move on, in that respect, and see who did.  She probably feels "safe," though, if I accept something like this and can't take the blame.

Well, it seems nothing matters to them.

People want to inappropriately stimulate her because the people monitoring me in private note that I posted about this critically traumatic experience.  I'm not retarded and I'm not shit.

When something happens in Ohio, she is said to be really uptight.

Some bitter people are going around LIKE I'M BAD AND SHE'S GOOD.  It's very common for some.  Who cares?

I feel I will never have a "relationship" with her, and somehow my life is ruined.  What was done?

It's like, in the end, I'm pushed away from her and she gets things as a relief from me and in ways takes what was mine.  She doesn't have to keep promises amid all her limelight, and I get teased if I have problems because I have a "relationship" with her, anyway, like I don't matter.

No one is a help.  I'm pretty frustrated.

I'm supposed to look for the silver lining by myself and get just trash as messages.

Why is this man such a big deal? like in a way that ruins my life and is teased it's when they feel I did something they didn't like, even though I wasn't really bad and was probably private.  It was pretty retarded, too.  It shouldn't be a problem.  I don't know why any excuse like this would be acceptable to snap like I'm a mad animal.

Shit

Somehow, every Saturday is dedicated to a Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to have a "relationship" with but along with featuring a man, like to bother me and make the rest of my life "shit" like I did something.  It's probably in the hands of the lady.

Do you think they help waste my time?

When I try to cool down, they make me feel bad.

They're just picking on me and not letting me cope with a problem.

They won't stop saying more shit to post here that ruins my life.

It seems the stimulation is going in excess to Late Baby Boomers and their Generation YZA children.

They keep inappropriately finding ways that an Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to have a "relationship" with get stimulated.

They're following me making little noises around the group home.

They are ruining a Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to hav a "relationship" with.

They keep acting like it's not working out.

The people monitoring me in private are being very mean to me.

Fact, they keep popping in like they're good and I'm bad.

It seems like the thing to do to always give me a comeback.

Fact, the people monitoring me in private keep acting awkwardly.

They go crazy if they don't understand something and don't own that they couldn't answer my questions.

I noticed they make me more mad if I'm a little mad, and they get mad if I think of a curse word or something.

I feel people are looking to my life to see if they can detract from it something important at the time, waiting around, and say it's my discipline to watch out if I did something.

They restrict my hope.

They think they need to surround me like I did something bad to make my life exciting, but it takes away from my productivity.

The cars outside keep sending bad messages and are inclined to say it was from the lady.

They might be ruining my body.

I'm tired from them beating me up and staring me down.

They keep acting out of place and are convinced I feel for it, and it probably makes me look bad.

These people monitoring me in private are pissing me off.  They keep thinking I agree I'm bad and ruining my life.

So, they ended up saying the lady is not all that, like because of something I did they found out.

They don't give a fuck on their part and are tormenting me for feeling upset and whatever I thought when made more upset but also because of somewhat more mild physical reactions of feeling tormented by them in private.  I stayed home to avoid trouble as much as possible, and they are ruining my life.

Not that you can handle this idea, but I can't always escape the people monitoring me in private.  They find excuse to blame me, but they don't makes sense.  I didn't do anything that I deserve to be tormented so nor anymore than anyone else.

They keep getting more picky rather than more cooperative.  They act like I was really bad to even show a little physical sign of anger in private.

They said I couldn't have a "relationship" I'm supposedly supposed to have with a Late Baby Boomer European lady, like something went wrong or I'm "not as good as" she is.

Why try?

It's too late to try to make things better, with them..

So, I wonder what people have been up to around the area and world, while I slept.

They keep trying to make me seem older than a Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to have a "relationship" with because it ticked me off and I emitted a physical response.

I think I saw they went crazy because I may have forgotten my pills one night..

The cars said the lady thinks I must have problems but "just like my dad."

I've already said I've noticed that it looks too easy to take away things from me by pretending I'm in trouble.

They make problems that don't get fixed, it seems, and they even bribe that they have to be.

They keep thinking they say stuff and then they fix it, but in the process a Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to have a relationship with was turned into a baby! whoever did it and however it was done.

It's like a Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly am supposed to have a relationship with is dead to me now just because I noticed something and was slightly upset.

People keep seeing me as a savage beast and paint a different picture of what actually happened and make it seem much worse and in the end always get away with being ridiculous, people sitting on their tushes like there's nothing better for some people to do.

They're stalling time so I can't accomplish.

I've expressed my problems, and now it's too late!!!

I just realized I'm supposed to have some way to relieve my frustration a bit physically rather than sitting there like a stone statue.  Everyone knows.  Instead of going crazy when it's too late.

I was told to acquire the problems of someone else.

The cars outside dish out more and more problems, some of which they have to have been told by them as an outside source maybe recently.

They alter how the page load on the computer to send a message across!

So, it's like I just lost everything for no reason.

They won't stop forcing me to be certain ways where the Late Baby Boomer European lady feels younger than me like a baby, and it's someone else treating me like shit and I can't stand it.  They want my body to change!

It won't stop.

I said to stop.

They won't stop being mean to me.

They said maybe they're not kidding, like a Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to have a relationship with turned into a baby like it's "actually" her overall dream..

I DIDN'T EVEN DO ANYTHING

See, now people ruined it for me.  I thought I just faintly caught that a Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to have a relationship with had to forget about me, that she's just "gonna die" and gave our "relationship" for her away to someone else, instead.

Those people knew how delicate these situations are and made it hard for me!  No one gives a fuck!

Wait, I heard more.  I keep hearing bad news from the cars outside.  I feel a picture was painted of me that's clearly mostly fantasized that I am the bad guy.  What do I do now?  This is no. joke to me.  I don't joke about the truth, in ways, because it's wrong.

I'm gonna go eat.  I got some more sleep and got tired.  I didn't even get to take a shower etc.

I don't know why it's so weird that it's so easy to point fingers at me in Ohio.  I know the people monitoring me in private just "drop it like it's hot."  They just use my uncertainties to turn them into insecurities.

Everyone around me is such shit.  What am I dealing with their sin for?

They keep threatening and now more to ruin a Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to have a "relationship" with.

These people won't stop acting disgusting on purpose.  They listened to my dad.  They think that's my fascination / role model form.

Things are considered my fault if brought up by others around me.  I just try to fix my feeling bad, and they say that means "doing something" for me.

There's a new thing, in case you didn't notice, that, if anything is a little weird and disagreeable, now it's over for me.  It's because now I'm in Ohio and not Orlando, but to me it doesn't mean anything.  I think this, saying where you live determines if you can feel accomplished/satisfactory or well off etc. in different situations, seems to remind me of things as the result of some Baby Boomer "trash" and how they ruined it for the good people of Generation XY and thought good people were actually worse than bad people.

I'm being pretty even keel, but they just tend to beat me up.

The people monitoring me in private are doing things to me they would never do if my parents were alive to witness it.

They like to act stupid and point fingers at me and won't "shut up" when something doesn't click right with them.

I was attacked again, like no one gives a shit.  I'm supposed to not be upset about what happens.  I don't think I technically meant anything bad.  This is actually wrong.  They think it's a game for me to play.

Apparently, the circumstances mean nothing, either way.

It's like I did something.

I feel inadvertently in trouble for feeling upset about what a car said about something I just saw.  Thanks for this day, I don't take this crap about getting in my way.

The people monitoring me in private keep acting superficial and mean.

I keep getting bad news about a "relationship" I'm supposedly supposed to have with an older lady.

I have to keep listening to the stupidity of their projects on me.

People have made life unreasonable in expectation.

It takes time for my body to settle down after being shocked.  It happens rather cyclically and often.

The people monitoring me in private area acting stupid again and want me to feel a goofy way in code.

Why do somehow see myself out if I did what they did to me?  I never agreed, it was not my idea, and it spun out of control.  They/People just sat there when I inquired if they believed that this was needed to feel something.

It seems my life is always ruined, no matter what.

They are still "just sitting there" not telling me if these noises are just messages and don't care if I feel hurt like something is often bad or not good happening to a Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to have a "relationship" with.

So, I had an idea, but I know it isn't true probably.  I remember maybe they made these things seem so anyway.

They keep over-simplifying issues like if I disagree I'm being defiant.

They keep bringing to light differences of convictions.

The people monitoring me in private act like lunatics.  They think they're all that and just trashing my life, like I "like" to come to them and for intelligence sake.

The Late Baby Boomer European lady keeps being shown to have strange antics like I must be in trouble.

It's like I'm considered in trouble to a Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to have a relationship with.  There's ll these distractions and excuses.

They just go in and do it.

The people monitoring me in private keep tormenting me in different ways.

I noticed they keep picking on me like I'm supposed to post it but then again they don't want me to ... "or else."  If I do, I just feel laughed at, in a certain case.

They get upset if I talk to other people I like a lot like I'm gonna get to talk to a Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to have a "relationship" with and therefore shouldn't.  It's just a calendar of her getting inappropriately stimulated with major checkpoints.  I notice I still talk to other people..  It's like it's thought of as a good idea, without a sensible explanation.  They even reserve people who talk to them but are not me..  Actually, I usually feel pretty alone, abandoned.

It's funny like I'm supposed to ignore stuff and everyone else gets in some hype but sometimes supposedly catastrophically.

I keep waking up to people panicking, sometimes, that a Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to have a relationship with has a problem and like it's collectively my fault and will affect my happiness, like, all the time.  They're looking for excitement.  They think this is necessary, in fact, but in this case seem rather pathetic.  Older people seem able to function despite all odds, while younger people struggle, today.  So, I'm wondering "what all the fuss is about."  Supposedly, people ganged up on her and inappropriately stimulated her, because her situation she got underground famous over me and they think someone else will do it worse if they don't, but that's just who they are and everyone keeps doing things like this. They are blaming me for my thoughts.

For some reason, I feel the people monitoring me in private are hovering over me like I "just realized something."  Something's been bothering me for 8 months, around when my dad died, something I did when I felt bad, nothing really illegal.  These people won't leave me alone it feels, like they want to over-effect me, like when the fire detector felt like it was talking at least like every 20 seconds for a few months and that it was a maybe English-Australian lady, trying to displace and take over a "relationship" I was supposedly supposed to have with an Late Baby Boomer European lady.  It seems like "no one gives a fuck" about what they do to me because they have the people monitoring me in private to punish me for even accidentally thinking of a curse word because people in school etc. used to a lot.  It feels they may ruin me, and my hatred is boiling.  I might almost make it, and something they say might set off my day.  I have to realize who's really bad and who's really more innocent, so I'm not in the wrong "frame of mind."

Suddenly, I sensed spill someone ruining a Late Baby Boomer European lady I'm supposedly supposed to have a "relationship" with.

Everyone is just sitting there, lackadaisical, like "dead."  It's sorta inappropriate to be a suction to life.